Announcing a list of people she has decided to ban from coming to Britain because she doesn't like their opinions, Home Secretary Jacqui Smith declared, 'If you can't live by the rules that we live by, the standards and the values that we live by, we should exclude you.'

Bugger. Presumably we're now only going to allow in cheats who fiddle their expenses (and would probably have ended up in jail in any other walk of life) and steal money from British taxpayers.