he other day I had a bit of a cycling nightmare. I was late leaving work, my pannier was stuffed with vegetables from the organic box scheme I'm part of and I was off on holiday the next day.
I was totally out of luggage capacity and I desperately needed to take home a pair of office shoes to wear in France.
There was no way round it, I was going to have to cycle home in my office shoes and socks with my sporty cycling-length trousers.
A fashion crime uncomfortably close to wearing socks and sandals.
This means I need to cycle extra fast to get home as soon as possible and protect my dignity. But cycling home seems even more problematic than usual. Apparently sock toting cyclists are not welcome by drivers. Getting out on to the main road is even harder than usual.
Thinking about what you wear when cycling seems slightly self absorbed - nobody really cares what they look like on a bike do they?
Surely wearing a big unsightly plastic thing on your head and either shortened trousers or trouser clips kind of counts you out of the dating game anyway.
My huge luminous cycling jacket is brilliant for visibility and fantastically waterproof but it makes me feel about as attractive as the back end of a bus. And we all now how attractive cyclists find them.
A Bristol company thinks differently though. Carefree Cycle Tours offer cycle dating. I think speed dating has just about had its day - though perhaps I'm biased. Anyone who has had to endure speed networking' will rue the day 'speed' anything was ever dreamed up and especially since it was adopted by eager conference organisers up and down the land. Cycle dating seems to be infinitely more civilised.
The dropping of the word speed instantly gets me on board, as I'm one for letting relationships develop organically.
I hate to think what people think of me after a two minute conversation. I'm guessing the grumpy/feisty/defensive boxes would have lots of ticks in them. So cycle dating seems like a perfect antidote to the modern day obsession with speed, sound bites and spin.
I wonder if there is a more perfect way of meeting someone than on a bike ride? There are probably lots of things you can tell about the way someone rides with a group.
Are riders keen to always be at the front as competitive in the relationship field? Do those that stay in the middle make partners happy to cruise along at everyone else's pace? Are back row cyclists far too slow to be worth waiting for? Or are they just displaying their kinder side? (my bet is that they are simply getting the best view).
And what a great story to tell; 'it was when I saw him change gear that I really knew It was her waterproof panniers that did it for me.'.
Oxford must be full of such stories - or at least have great potential for them. Perhaps we've hit on a fantastic opportunity for a new Oxford service; cycle dating - meeting people the Oxford way.
Remember, you heard it here first.
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