REGULAR readers of this column may well recall my colleague, Motor Mouth, having a rant about 4x4s a little while ago.

At the time, although he is indeed a good friend and a respected fellow hack, I felt his comments were perhaps a little harsh.

Well, although I hate to admit that MM is right (he is a man after all), how wrong I was!

I witnessed first-hand the substandard driving skills of a 4x4 owner the other day, as he reversed his large shiny beast directly into the wing of my dainty little unassuming car.

It luckily happened at a reasonably slow speed, but nevertheless it caused a few hundred pounds worth of damage, a reasonable amount of inconvenience and a traffic jam ... Just before school-run time.

He didn’t hear me shouting at him or my horn blaring and continued to drive backwards out of his drive, crumpling my bodywork.

When he finally came out of his reversing-induced coma and realised what had happened (when I put my hazard lights on, got out of the car and started asking him what his motivation was for doing such a silly thing... or words to that effect) he said, ‘Oh dear, never mind. It was his fault’ and pointed to the entirely innocent but now irritated driver behind me, who did a sort of Italian throwing his hands in the air gesture.

He went on: “That driver behind you signalled to me to come out. I thought the road was clear, I didn’t see you.” BRILLIANT!

“Oh dearie me” I said in a triumphantly patronising fashion “you see the thing is (head on one side), it’s YOUR responsibility to check that the road behind you is clear...”

He got a bit snippy at that point so I suggested moving my car on to his drive and exchanging details. As I got back in my car the driver behind me raised his eyes to the heavens in a sort of despairing way.

Now, I would just like to point out that I was stationary when this incident occurred, waiting at traffic lights.

The man in the 4x4 (and here lies the critical fact) was moving. You see, even at low speeds, 4x4 drivers still seem to think they own the road.

  • Kev Dyer and Motor Mouth finally returns next week. He and Lady Driver will be taking it in turns to fill this column in future issues.