The government loves running surveys to find out how happy we are and measure the “feel-good factor”. But I’m convinced they’re coming at this from the wrong angle, because what they should be asking is: “How grumpy are you?”.

I’ve come up with some mini-questions of my own, so you can see where I’m going with this: 1. Thinking about the past few weeks, have you spent way too much money on a) food you ended up throwing away/now wish you hadn’t eaten; b) presents for people you don’t like/wish you’d kept for yourself; and c) going to parties/pubs when you really wanted to stay at home and watch a boxset?

2. Have you foolishly agreed, while hungover, that it would be a great idea to have a dry January, so now can’t have a pint on the way home/when you get home from work?

3. Have you sworn to abandon chocolate, cakes, biscuits and chips forever, in a desperate attempt to shed the 10 pounds you’ve piled on over Christmas and New Year?

4. Are you in your office trawling through 500 emails (400 of them junk), with nothing but a crispbread and handful of stale nuts to look forward to for lunch?

If you can sullenly nod at any, or all, of the above, you’ve earned the right to be grumpy and who am I (equally grumpy), to try to cheer you up?

Instead, I have two words that may make you choke on your crispbread – tax return.

Yes, January isn’t just about diets, de-toxes and overdrafts, it’s also about deadlines.

In this case, that’s January 31, which is the last chance to submit an online return for the 2013-2014 tax year.

It’s not just self-employed people and firms this applies to, because anyone who earns extra cash from rent, lodgers or another lucrative sideline such as selling jewellery, running a market stall or a blackmail racket, may need to file one.

And according to HM Revenue & Customs, there are still five million of us who haven’t done it yet, so if, like me, you’re one of them, hurry up as there are penalties for missing the deadline, starting from £100 for being just a day late.

Now back to the C word – if you were given a gift voucher, the government would like to ask you about that, too.

Consumer Affairs Minister Jo Swinson has urged us not to waste vouchers, pointing out they are another form of cash.

A staggering £300m-worth of them are never used, because they’re lost or forgotten about, according to research by the UK Gift Card and Voucher Association.

Despite what you might think, shops are super-keen for us to spend gift vouchers, because most of us end up trading-up to something more expensive and buying extra stuff we don’t need.

Come to think of it, I was given a gift voucher for Christmas but I’m not sure what I’ve done with it.

Bah. Another thing to feel grumpy about.

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