Catherine Blaxhall, head of Carers Support and OxBEL Action for Carers (Oxfordshire) on the problems faced by long distance carers
Long distance caring can pose unique challenges. If a carer lives a distance away from a loved one who needs care, some of the issues range from coordinating services, providing emotional and physical support, co-ordinating support services such as arranging for household help or in-home care and managing financial matters.
Many long distance carers feel guilty that they can’t do more for their loved one. But they are only human and probably already care for others; a spouse or children, as well as holding down a job.
Long distance carers can only do their best and by keeping in close contact with loved ones, letting them know that they are always available at the end of the phone, showing that they care.
With an aging population, more and more of us have caring responsibilities that are emotionally draining as well as physically demanding. But unlike previous generations, we no longer live close to our extended families.
Carers Oxfordshire provides a support service to Oxfordshire’s carers no matter where the cared for person lives. Most of the carers known to us do care for a family member, friend or neighbour, who lives close to them, but others do not and this poses complex challenges.
The Emergency Carers Support Service which provides free emergency cover in the event of a carers having an accident, sudden illness or crisis only covers cared for who live in the county, so if the cared for lives a distance away this service is unavailable to them and this can create massive challenges.
We recently supported a carer whose father lived in Devon and who needed four telephone calls a day to ensure he was prompted to take his medication and involved a weekly train journey to shop and wash his clothes. Exhausted, the carer sought help and was given a £300 carers grant to help with the costs of travel and telephone calls.
It is really important that carers look after their own health. Caring can be stressful and have emotional and physical impact on the carers own health. It is important that they register with their GP that they are a carer.
Long distance carers may find that they need to be organised to manage a work/life/caring balance and record arrangements, such as doctors’ appointments and social services visits, keeping a list of important phone numbers, such as relatives, doctors, pharmacies or charities handy. It can be very difficult to discuss financial issues but really important that these conversations take place in a timely and appropriate manner.
It is also important they find out where they can get help and support and perhaps join a carers support group where they can get peer support from other carers. Caring can be an isolating and lonely life and in some cases becomes all consuming with carers not having time to have a life of their own. Most of us will care or be cared for in our lifetimes and although it can be very stressful it is also something to celebrate that you care for a loved one.
Comments: Our rules
We want our comments to be a lively and valuable part of our community - a place where readers can debate and engage with the most important local issues. The ability to comment on our stories is a privilege, not a right, however, and that privilege may be withdrawn if it is abused or misused.
Please report any comments that break our rules.
Read the rules here