OH dear! The publishing of my letter with my suggested uniform changes for Thames valley Police (Oxford Mail, September 13) appears to have worried the currently serving members of my old employer.

I have received a number of calls from those who will be patrolling our streets, protecting us from wrong-doers, and constantly attempting to bring to justice those miscreants who break the law.

They have commented in good humour, I think, upon my failure to fully recognise the advantages of the new all black uniform which, I am assured, will ensure that these guardians of the law perform their duties in a cool and comfortable manner, thereby giving the promise of a rise in detection rates and satisfaction among the general public who they so nobly serve.

Officers, perhaps I was too hasty in passing judgement on the new look, and should have waited a little longer to ascertain what the advantages of it would be.

But surely this is what the handymen and support staff have been wearing for the past few years, so there should be no necessity for such delay?

There did appear to be one advantage from my first scanning of the garments. At least the wearers could pop off for a relaxing game of golf after an arduous tour of duty. Just remove the body armour, and, hey presto!

Alas, golf clubs have a fairly strict code of dress and I fear the new uniform might not meet their criteria.

I am off to sunny climes for a while, but look forward to my return to popping down to Buckingham Palace to check whether the guards are enjoying the benefits of parading in track suits and trainers Keep up the good work officers. I shall, of course, ensure that I keep up with the Oxford Mail while abroad, and I shall return refreshed and ready once again to offer my guidance on how to keep Thames Valley’s adoring public satisfied.

Chris Payne, Turnpike Road, Bicester