A grieving family have been told they are not allowed the headstone they want for their relative's grave because it is 'too shiny'.

Grandfather-of-five William Cooper, formerly of Bagley Close, Kennington, died of lung cancer in September last year, aged 77.

His family had chosen a polished granite, open-book style tombstone for his grave in Kennington Cemetery, off Sandy Lane, but were told earlier this week that polished or painted stones are not permitted under diocese regulations.

His son, Robert, of Rivermead Road, Rose Hill, said he had counted at least 30 polished headstones already in the cemetery.

He said: "This is just a kick in the teeth. I just can't believe we're not allowed it because it's shiny. Lots of churchyards have polished ones. Why do they have to make it awkward for us?

"The problem with plain, matt stone is that is goes all dull and black, at least with polished stone you can keep it clean."

Mr Cooper's widow Phyllis, 78, of Bagley Close, Kennington, said: "I'm very upset -- it's the one thing we wanted to remember him by and we're not allowed to have it."

Grandson William, who lives with his grandmother, said: "My nan's been crying a lot because she can't have what everyone else has got and what she wants to remember him by.

"I don't think it's an outrageous request."

Diocese registrar John Rees said: "We're trying to encourage people to use good local stone, which will naturally blend in with the environment and also stuff that will weather down so it doesn't stand out. The thing about shiny marble is it's alien to the local stone and doesn't weather down.

"Strictly speaking, putting any memorial in any churchyard is a privilege, not a right, and that privilege can only be exercised if you have the permission of the clergy, who are guided by these regulations."

He added that existing polished headstones may have been laid there in periods when there was no clergy supervising the grounds, or in more lenient times.

He said if the Coopers wished to appeal against the regulations, they should contact him.

Mr Cooper was a life-long member of the St John Ambulance and was made an honorary Brother. He did volunteer work in Kennington, where he had lived almost all of his life, and tended graves in Marston Cemetery for about 18 years.