Grieving FoxFM DJ Danny Cox tells Fiona Tarrant about his fiancee and fellow broadcaster Sue McGarry who was found hanged at their home. Tuesday was a good day for Fox FM disc jockey Danny Cox and his fiancee, Thames Valley FM presenter Sue McGarry. He told me: "We'd had a normal day. We both worked out at the health club, cooked a meal, watched a movie and hugged that night. When the alarm went off on Wednesday, I got up, kissed Sue goodbye and left for work."
That was the last time he saw her alive. Sue, 35, a bubbly, entertaining and charming woman, took her own life that day. She hanged herself at the couple's home near Witney.
Although Sue had been receiving treatment over the past seven weeks for depression, during the past fortnight she had seemed almost her old self and there was nothing to indicate to Danny - or anyone else - that a tragedy was about to happen.
It was Danny, returning from his shift presenting Fox's morning show, who found Sue's body.
He said: "Obviously there are some things I don't want to go into and that's one of them. I'm still in a state of shock. I've blocked certain things out, which is how I'm able to talk to you now."
Danny, also 35, wanted to speak about Sue because he knows that many thousands of people in Oxfordshire feel, like him, that they've lost someone they love. "I'm very proud of Sue. On air she was very bubbly and a friend to all the listeners. In private, when she left the radio station, she continued to be an inspiration to many people.
"Sue was a unique, marvellous person who brightened people's lives just by being in their presence. She was a remarkable person who lived life to the full. She got a lot out of life and gave a lot to everyone she knew. That's why depression and what happened seem so totally against the grain."
Danny's voice - trained through years of radio presenting - hides his pain. Occasionally his voice changes as he speaks but he is totally focused, wanting to express his admiration and love for the woman he shared his life with.
Although the trauma, for him, hasn't yet sunk in, Danny knows the depth of feeling for Sue and for him.
The couple had known each other for about 15 years. They met at a BBC radio station in Leicester and there was an instant attraction, although they both had other partners at the time. It was about six years ago that a good friendship turned into more and Danny and Sue became a couple.
They became engaged two years ago. Danny proposed on Valentine's Day at sunrise as they sailed into Jamaica on a cruise.
"We had planned to marry but never got around to the details. We'd been together so long we both considered ourselves married anyway. We loved each other very much," said Danny.
Sue's illness came on seven weeks ago. Earlier in the year she had miscarried, and although she and Danny were terribly upset, even he doesn't know if it was that which triggered her depression.
"Sue was an intelligent woman. She had interviewed many experts over the years and she knew the symptoms of depression.
"She was aware of what was happening and, after trying to deal with it in our way, at home, for three or four days, Sue recognised that she couldn't control it any more and went to the GP. She was very clued-up about it all."
Sue's illness meant spending time in Littlemore Hospital. She was there for five weeks but then divided her time between home and the hospital. "The medical staff at the hospital were as shocked as we were over what's happened," said Danny. "In fact Sue had been told, on the day before the tragedy, that she could come home permanently from next Monday."
While friends and family rally round Danny, he is drawing comfort from their support and from the messages being passed to him from listeners.
"One thing that has surprised me in all this is to find out how common depression is and how many people know someone who has suffered from it."
"The biggest shock is that Sue seemed to be over the worst of it. There were no signals that this was going to happen."
Now, as the couple's families make arrangements for her funeral, they must draw comfort from the knowledge that everyone knew how special Sue was, even if she wasn't her for very long.
He added: "I put a line on the end of the report I had to do for the coroner, which seems to sum everything up. I said I knew the moment I met Sue that she would be my partner for life. I just didn't know that life could be that short." *Details of Sue's funeral have not yet been finalised. The couple's families are deciding whether to have a private service or one where everyone who knew and loved Sue can pay their respects. However, a memorial service in celebration of her life will be held in the near future. Sue McGarry had a career to be proud of. In addition to her consumer journalism slot on Thames Valley FM, she had presented a show as a disc jockey on Radio Two.
Danny recalled: "In fact, the last one she did was on the night Diana died."
Then there was the evening programme she presented for Radio Five Live and a series, recorded a while ago, for Radio Four called Music Which Bonds Us, about music that meant something special to couples.
"She was really proud of that and was hopeful of a longer series next year. I know listeners at Thames Valley knew her well but there were other things she was doing as well."
Converted for the new archive on 30 June 2000. Some images and formatting may have been lost in the conversion.
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