CAN anyone remember who created the bizarre class of off-road vehicle that never dips an elegant toe in anything deeper than a Park Lane puddle?

I blame Suzuki for the rise and rise of the phoney 4x4.

The rot started back in 1979 with the arrival of the lovable little LJ80, looking for all the world like a cuddly little Jeep.

Hot on its heels came the swinging SJ with its singular styling, bright colours and fresh looks, making it another instant hit - particularly with young drivers.

The four by four by fun vehicle had arrived.

A capability to plough across rough, rutted fields and loadspace ratings reckoned in haybales were never part of the calculation.

The arrival of the Vitara brought frill-seeking hairdressers out in their droves, bolting on macho-looking bodykit by the bumper load and joining Suzuki's Rhino Club to hurtle headlong into a one-day-a-year orgy of organised mud-plugging.

Now alongside the off-beat X-90 and new Jimny, Suzuki has another contender for the title of champion off-roader that-never- goes-off-road.

Bigger, bolder and altogether more capable, the Grand Vitara looks suitably mean and meaty and, ironically, is a competent off-road tool.

But I'll still bet most will spend their time hunting for a parking slot at Sainsbury's rather than stalking stags on a rock-strewn craggy Highland hill.

Its muscular manner is matched by a powerful new engine - the first 2.5-litre V6 to be fitted into a Suzuki.

Forget the jungle-crushing looks, the Grand Vitara's 24-valve engine pumps out a silky 142 horsepower, making the car a swift and relaxed motorway cruiser.

Spacious, comfortable and versatile, the Grand Vitara offers family-sized space in a neat package, which also slips nicely into the average-sized garage.

The cabin is smartly trimmed with a Sony stereo radio-cassette-CD player, which has a pop-on cover, hiding a mass of dazzlingly distracting hi-fi controls under a bland black facade. Take my advice and leave the cover on, it's safer.

The interior is user-friendly with plenty of storage areas provided for oddments, including a lockable glove box, centre console box, trays under both front seats, cup holders and pockets in the front and rear doors and in the rear of the front seat backs.

Beneath the flat rear load area, which has useful retaining rings for load securing straps, there is a tray with storage compartments.

Returning briefly to the off-road front, the four-wheel-drive system can be changed from two to four-wheel drive at the flick of a switch.

Driving performance is boosted with power-assisted, rack-and-pinion steering and a seven-position tilt-adjustable steering wheel boosts the car-like driving feel.

But you don't want to hear this technical prattle, you want to know about the range of accessories available.

It's simply seventh heaven for frippery freaks. There are graphics, decals, wood dashboard trim, cargo tray, roof racks, storage boxes, detachable tow bar, front and rear guards, aluminium door sills...

Auto facts

Model: Suzuki Grand Vitara

Price: £16,370 on-the-road

Insurance: Group 13D

Fuel consumption:

Urban 21.6mpg

Extra urban 31mpg

Combined 26.6mpg

Length: 165.2in

Width: 70.1in

Comfort: Excellent

Fuel tank: 15 gallons

Braked towing wt: 1,850kg

Converted for the new archive on 30 June 2000. Some images and formatting may have been lost in the conversion.