Not even sublime medieval architecture is enough to save Pizza Express from mediocrity, says Tim Hughes

There once was a time, back in what now seems like the Dark Ages, where in many medium-sized towns, eating out in style meant one thing – Pizza Express.

In a country where pizza meant either Domino’s, Pizza Hut or Pizzaland (remember them?), Pizza Express represented something new, bright and authentically Italian. Those thin crusts topped, not with slimy slices of mechanically-recovered meat product and rubbery cheese, but with such fresh, zingy delights as artichokes, pine kernels, spinach and real mozzarella.

When I was working in public relations in Buckinghamshire a few years ago, business lunches meant Pizza Express. The same was true for date nights.

But times have changed. Quality pizza is now two-a-penny. Where your local boozer may once have served up scampi and chips, you can probably now dig into a perfect wood-fired or stone baked quattro stagioni. So where does Pizza Express fit in with the rash of upstarts snapping at its doughy heels?

You may have seen the story, widely circulated online and stoked by a frenzy of retweeting, of the student journalist invited to review her local branch of Pizza Express in Peterborough.

The young women in question, Holly Aston, was initially pilloried by cynics, but then praised for her frank, if naively written, review which contained such remarks as: “My first reaction when they put it down on the table was ‘wow’ as it looked perfectly cooked and quite big in size”.

It went on to receive more than 5,300 Facebook likes and 1,456 re-tweets – garnering support from such heavy hitters as Caitlin Moran and Jay Rayner. It was also seized upon by the national press.

Miss Aston awarded her local Pizza Express seven out of 10. Inspired by her praise, I set out to see how ours compared, and beat a trail to Golden Cross.

As anyone who has eaten there will know, the building itself is divine. A Grade II-listed medieval structure, apparently recorded in 1182 as Mauger’s Hall, it is among the city’s most beautiful edifices, even displaying patches of medieval murals protected by frames. Its beauty is even more remarkable given the ugliness of Cornmarket outside – with its uninspiring jumble of concrete and plate glass, bland chain stores and stench of fast food. It’s also huge, sprawling across the first floor, diners able to peep out at the courtyard below from wood-panelled splendour.

The food, however, fails to match the surroundings. We started with a portion of their trademark dough balls (also available in supermarkets I subsequently noticed). And while they were good and, er... doughy (£3.45), the dipping pot of butter which accompanied them should have been way more garlicky.

As a main course I chose risotto. This being a pizza joint, I now realise I shouldn’t have gone off-piste. I won’t again. Described as Risotto Fresco, a more appropriate name might have been ‘Risotto Freddo’ because it was stone cold. Yes, it was generously laced with salmon (“oak-roasted peppered fillet” no less) and finished with rocket and lemon, but it was also frigid, dry and stodgy, with no hint of the creamy white wine advertised on the menu. At £10.95 it was pricey and, worst of all, unforgivably small.

My pizza-loving friend stuck to the plot and had a Pizza La Reine (prosciutto cotto ham, olives, mushrooms, £9.55), which was fine. It was absolutely okay.

Not amazing. Not overly-generous, a little stingy if anything, but passable.

Would I go back? I’m not sure. The pizza was tolerably good, but it is everywhere isn’t it? I could list a dozen places around Oxford (White Rabbit, Rusty Bicycle, Coco’s, Mama Mia, Branca...) where you can get wonderful pizza with imaginative toppings that would make a Neopolitan’s heart sing.

That 12th-century architecture though... now that is special!

Pizza Express, Golden Cross, Cornmarket Oxford, OX1 3EX

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