It's been 10 years since audiences were first wowed by the 'genital origami' extravaganza that is PUPPETRY OF THE PENIS.
Since then it has played to over 10 million people, been performed in five different languages, 28 countries and in temperatures ranging from 52 degrees to -38C! Such is its popularity that Simon Morley and his sidekick Friendy are still taking their art all around the world, and are coming to Oxford's New Theatre on Tuesday. We ask Australian Simon why he's back on tour and why he's still playing with himself in public: We're delighted to find that you're back on stage. But surely you must be able to retire with a full repertoire of houses, women, furs and diamante G-strings by now? Which begs the question: Why haven't you retired?
Well, I've semi-retired. I do spend more time training boys up and producing the show, rather than making shapes for the people. I pretty much take to the stage when time allows it.
Do you get bored of the touring?
Indeed I do. Who would have thought hey, a man getting bored of travelling the world, getting his penis out for an hour a night, and getting paid way too much for it? Think that's every man's dream gig.
Is it quite addictive (the call of the stage) or is it because you don't know how to do anything else?
Standing up there making thousands of people laugh till they cry is addictive. It's more the travelling that keeps me off the stage.
Are you still surprised by POTP's success?
Not really. Half of us have them, the other half are curious about them.
What's your most memorable show and why?
One that does come to mind is when we were performing in New York City in 2002. We arrived at our theatre as normal, but were rather shocked to find the foyer full of men undressing and stuffing their clothes into plastic bags. I quickly retreated to the relative safety of our dressing room.
The entire house that night — 350 seats — had been sold to a gay/naturist/theatre-loving group who love to sit naked and enjoy the variety of theatre that Broadway has to offer.
The only difference was, we were also naked. All of our witty banter about us being naked was out the window and irrelevant. Not so much a show, more of a workshop!
Best heckle?
"Show us your toes!"
Who goes to your shows?
Everywhere else in the world, we get male and female, young and old, gay and straight. But in the UK, it's mainly women. Not sure why really, it's probably the smartest ticket in town.
There will be a thousand women who have had too much to drink and can't wait to practise what they have just seen.
What's the thrill for them?
It's educational, liberating, and dymystifying. Oh, and a good old fashioned belly laugh for an hour.
Do you have to take care of you body and/or your 'friend' and if so why and how?
We have had to watch what we eat a little, but that's about it.
Do you wake up some mornings and think 'Oh God, I can't get it out on stage again?'
Sure, especially after a 'dickade' of doing this.
What is the thrill now?
Still seeing the fear of God in people's faces every night of the week.
Do you find that your profession brings out the cockiness in people (no pun intended) and the way that they treat you?
People usually do get a little excited and start to talk about genitalia. Once I was dining with my mother and a drunk fellow decided it was the perfect time to show me his attempt at a pelican. Needless to say, she was not amused.
Presumably while you are a star on stage, by day few people recognise you with your clothes on. Is that a good thing or not?
To be honest, we never get recognised. I think everyone is too busy looking somewhere else during the show.
What are you spending your riches on — not clothes obviously.
Well, we're not always naked, so a little on clothes. I actually have a clothing business in Bali with my brother, so I spend a lot on clothes! I'm in NYC and still tearing it up.
Touring for 10 years must have played havoc with your personal life.
I've managed. I've had the opportunity to live in some of the greatest cities in the world. We are also lucky enough to have had partners who travel and work with us behind the scenes.
Has it put you off intimacy?
Ooh no! Not at all.
Do women want you to do special tricks.....?
It's a very different show in the bedroom, I'm afraid.
Do you have scary groupies?
Occasionally, but usually everyone is a little too frightened.
What do you do when you're not on tour?
I like to be jumping in an ocean somewhere, fishing, playing golf, or writing.
Have you been to Oxford before?
I've been four times now, and love it. Very pretty town, and great nightlife.
And finally......(drum roll) age...?
42. Old enough to know better.
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