Raging hay fever, dehydration, mud, wasps, and barbecue- induced salmonella: summer is finally here, and with it the festival season.
Country, pop, folk, metal, world, techno and hard drum-and-bass: whatever you're into, you'll find it booming out near you.
That means some tough choices have to be made, so here are our hot tips for a lively summer of al fresco high jinks and sublime, chilled tunes
Truck Festival
A true cult gathering, Truck is an annual place of pilgrimage for everyone who cares about local music, and is, for many, the highlight of the summer.
Starting as an intimate gathering at Hill Farm, Steventon, it has grown, but not lost sight of its roots. This means it remains friendly, raises loads of money for charity, and is the ultimate springboard for hundreds of supremely talented, and extremely diverse, musicians from Oxfordshire and beyond.
Like many of the good things in life, you kind of know what to expect, and the same familiar faces do crop up year after year - both on stage, in the crowd, and at the bar. But that only adds to the family vibe.
Highlights this year include Morrison Steam Fayre, The Lemonheads, Camera Obscura, Get Cape Wear Cape Fly, Piney Gir, Noah & The Whale, Danny & the Champions of the World, and rave legends Altern-8. Bring on the acid revival!
* Fuelled by cider, Rotary Club burgers and the vicar's ice cream.
Takes place at: Steventon. July 19-20. Tickets £60 + £5 parking (No VIP. thank heavens).
www.thisistruck.com.
Latitude
Okay, it's a bit of a hike, but worth it.
Another classy boutique gathering, this one takes place in the woods, around a stunning lake in deepest East Anglia.
Bands include New York New Wave legends Blondie, Brighton's British Sea Power, Toronto indie/punk/dance faves Crystal Castles, Icelandic post-rockers Sigur Ros, Elbow, The Breeders, MIA, Franz Ferdinand, Martha Wainright, and Interpol.
Oh... and there's also comedy, from such monsters of mirth as Bill Bailey, Omid Djalili, Ross Noble, Frankie Boyle and Rich Hall; literary turns from the bookish Simon Armitage, Hanif Kureishi, Irvine Welsh and Iain Banks; poetry from Adrian Mitchell, John Hegley and Carol Ann Duffy; and cabaret.
And all it takes place in a glorious natural setting. Enjoy a slice of heaven - but with rock! *Juice from fresh rosy apples, handpicked from the surrounding forest.
Takes place at: Henham Park, Southwold, Suffolk. July 17- 20 July. Tickets are £130 for the weekend (£55 a day). Call 0870 060 3775.
www.latitudefestival.co.uk
Global Gathering
Living proof that dance music is alive and kicking like a mule. An immense gathering of the trance, house, techno, electro and drum and bass tribes; more than 45,000 people are expected to enjoy the likes of Moby, Mark Ronson and, making an exclusive UK outdoor appearance, Kanye West. Plus 120 DJs.
*Fuelled by: Red Bull and other stimulants.
Takes place at: Long Marston, near Stratford-Upon-Avon July 25-26. Weekend tickets are £115 (£165 VIP). Call 0871 789 1010.
www.globalgathering.co.uk
WOMAD
The spiritual home of 27,000 World music lovers, WOMAD (World of Music and Dance) brings the rhythms of Africa, Asia and Latin America, to the West Country for probably the most wholesome festival of them all.
Its move from Reading to Wiltshire has made it harder to reach, but has given this chilled-out gathering an even more magical, pastoral ambience.
Catering to a laid-back, sophisticated audience, Womad is also a great family fest - with loads to keep the kids busy while the adults slurp their organic cider and get down to some fine samba, soca, ragga or rai.
*Fuelled by: Chai.
Takes place at: Charlton Park, Malmesbury. July 25-27. Weekend tickets are £125 (day and concs tickets available).
www.womad.org
Fairport's Cropredy Convention
Rivalling the Bulldog Bash as a showcase of fine facial hair, Cropredy is an altogether more sedate proposition. Think deck chairs, pewter tankards, real ale and woolly jumpers and you're pretty much there.
If it's sunny there's nowhere nicer. If it rains, well, let's not think about that. Acts include Supergrass, The Levellers, Midge Ure, Three Daft Monkeys and BBC Radio 2 presenter Marc Radcliffe's band Family Mahone - who are worth the ticket price alone. Oh, and there's also a slot by some guys called Fairport Convention.
*Fuelled by: Wadworth 6X.
Takes place at: Cropredy, near Banbury. August 7-9. Weekend tickets are £76 (other options available).
www.fairportconvention.com
Reading Festival
Rage Against the Machine, The Killers, Metallica, CSS, Bloc Party, Queens of the Stone Age, Manic Street Preachers, Lethal Bizzle, The Whip, Hadouken!,The Last Shadow Puppets, The Cribs, Vampire Weekend, MGMT, Slipknot, Feeder, Dropkick Murpheys over the August Bank Holiday weekend, in a big messy old field? 'The job', is quite definitely, 'a good 'un!' It's not pretty, but with a line-up like this, who cares?
Three days, 150 acts, cold beer, and it's just a short hop on the train. What is there not to like?
Fuelled by Southern fried chicken and lager
Takes place at: Reading. August 22-24. Not surprisingly, tickets have long-since sold out.
www.readingfestival.com
Glastonbury
The grandaddy of festivals, Glastonbury remains the greatest of them all. A huge sprawling monster of a party, for this weekend it will be the biggest city in Somerset.
Thousands of artists are lined up to play at the gathering, which starts properly tomorrow - though most revellers have been on the site since Thursday or even Wednesday.
Acts include the Verve, Jay-Z, Amy Winehouse, Kings of Leon, Massive Attack, Spiritualised, Elbow, Manu Chao, Goldfrapp, Leonard Cohen, Shakin' Stevens, Alabama 3, Editors, Oxford's Foals, Young Knives, The Epstein, A Silent Film, and BBC Introducing contest winners Jonquil.
But Glastonbury is not about the bands. It's about the crazy circus of surreal creativity which pervades this pastoral slice of nirvana. Let's just pray for sunshine!
*Fuelled by Scrumpy and falafal.
Takes place at: Worthy Farm, Pilton, Somerset. Today-Sunday. Tickets are £155.
www.glastonburyfestivals.co.uk
Cornbury
The Rolls Royce of music festivals, Cornbury kicks off next week. This will be the fifth year for the aristocratic tea party/festival hybrid, which is set in stunning parkland near Charlbury. And while still deserving of its nickname, this year's 'Poshstock' shows it's no chinless wonder, with a respectable line-up featuring Crowded House, Half Man Half Biscuit, Beverley Knight, KT Tunstall, The Bangles, and some bloke called Paul Simon. Folkies meanwhile, are indulged on the Sunday by an Oxford Folk Festival stage, headlined by the mighty Bellowhead. And then there are the local acts - with the likes of Smilex, The Epstein and Jessica Goyder representing the cream of homegrown talent. Could this be the year we see shock-rock frontman Lee Christian and Art Garfunkel's former partner duetting on Sound of Silence? Stranger things have happened!
*Fuelled by Pimms and smoked salmon Takes place at: Cornbury Park, Charlbury. July 5-6. Adult weekend tickets £90 (£110 with camping). Day and VIP tickets available.
www.cornbury festival.com
Bulldog Bash
This eye-popping festival may occupy the same venue as Global Gathering, but the vibe couldn't be more different. Instead of gurning dance fans, imagine thousands of Hell's Angels and technoheads.
The line-up hasn't been revealed, but will include the Fun Lovin' Criminals and Neville Staple. But you've also got drag racing, the world's best Wall of Death and awesome facial hair.
*Fuelled by chips, curry, beer and petrol.
Takes place at: Long Marston, Stratford-Upon-Avon. August 7-10. Tickets are £50 if you book them now.
http://bulldogbash.eu
Bestival
Oh, Bestival!
Quite frankly, the name says it all!
Rob da Bank's fantasy festival has grown from a tiny cult gathering to a, well, slightly larger cult gathering, attracting probably the best, and most diverse, line-up in festie history.
Just imagine: The Sugarhill Gang, Amy Winehouse, Underworld, My Bloody Valentine, CSS, 808 State, The Breeders, Aphex Twin, George Clinton, Baaba Maal, Gary Numan, The Human League, Pendulum and Foals, all playing in a gorgeous chalk valley on the edge of the Isle of Wight, among woods populated by red squirrels and outrageously attired party-goers all donning fancy dress.
* Fuelled by Absinthe.
Takes place at: Robin Hill Park, Isle of Wight, September 5-7.
www.bestival.net
The Last Days of Summer
The Johnny-come-lately of festivals, this is a bit on an unknown quantity, only announced a matter of weeks ago. But, on the face of it, it looks like a tasty little get-together, with the likes of Supergrass, Athlete, The Rascals, Black Kids, Fun Lovin' Criminals, Young Knives, and what promises to be a great secret guest, gracing the grounds of Stowe House, near Buckingham.
* Fuelled by Vintage port.
Takes place at Stowe, on Bank Holiday Monday August 25. Tickets are £39.50 (£99.50 VIP) + parking.
www.thelastdaysofsummer.com
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